PRACTICING SELF COMPASSION: AN APPROACH TO CONSIDER

Compassion Wallhanging

Compassion Wallhanging

Do past regrets and feelings of embarrassment sometimes pop up in your thoughts and emotions? Do you ever look back and “kick yourself” for something you did that you judge as “stupid”?

Instead of being stuck in hurt and more judging, such moments can be seen as opportunities for healing.

Being human, we’ve probably all got some yet-to-be-resolved issues “stuck,” in our consciousness and in our bodies. When they bubble up from their storage places, it can be a good thing because, when they do, we can free ourselves of some negative energy. We can also grow in compassion and wisdom.

How? Here’s one approach that I’ve found to be helpful.

When any old judgments come up, I first acknowledge the present feelings. Instead of fighting them or engaging in more judging, I let the uncomfortable feelings be. I breathe deeply and notice the sensations in my body. I observe them for a few minutes while I deliberately “open” my heart to the gift of compassion, which results in a softening in my whole body.

Then, I set an intention to release as much as I can of the painful energy that has come to the fore. I visualize it floating up, up, and away.

To further the power of that clearing visualization, I will often go outdoors, blow bubbles, and imagine the bubbles carrying the released energy away.

Next, I apply a dose of loving kindness to myself with encouraging self talk. Aren’t we more likely to heal and grow when we are gentle with ourselves than when we criticize?

I think it’s time to forgive ourselves for all the judgments we’ve made of ourselves (and others) as “stupid” or “bad” or “not good enough.”

Truly, we’ve been doing our best, all along…even in those things we later saw as mistakes.

So let’s aim to forgive ourselves for all the harsh judgments we’ve ever made. Let’s ask Inner Wisdom for guidance and grace… and listen. We might be shown an honoring action we can take to further reconcile and come to peace. Valuable life lessons and insights might come forth. From our Inner Sanctuary, we are likely to hear reminders of our goodness and worthiness.

Let’s affirm that: the goodness and worthiness in all humanity.

And, then say “Thank You” for all the guidance and grace that we have received and for the compassion and courage that we are bringing to our life journey.

***

You may wish to consider doing a 28-Day Self Compassion Practice. Here’s how: 

  • Click here to go to the Forgiveness Calendar

  • Then download and print the calendar.

  • Keep it in a handy place to use for a 28-day period, such as in a bedside nightstand.

  • Each morning or night, or at another convenient time, pause and consider a way that you have judged yourself or another person, either recently or in the past. Notice if there is any way you are judging right in the moment.

  • Begin using the box on the top line that corresponds to the day you are starting the practice, i.e. Monday, Tuesday, etc.

  • In the small space, write, “I forgive myself for judging (and then name the specific) and the date. As you write, intend to be in touch with the compassion that dwells in you.

  • Continue on through the calendar, day by day for 28 days, until you have written in each box.

  • Destroy or discard the calendar as you wish. It is meant to be released.

  • In a way that is authentic and comfortable to you, offer yourself some compassion and appreciation for your willingness to heal and grow.

  • Perhaps cross your hands over your heart or give yourself a hug!

  • Say “Thank You” to you know Who and you.

  • Repeat as often as you wish.

 (The article and self-help activity above are offered for educational consideration. They are not meant to replace professional guidance and care. All content on this website is meant for inspirational purposes. Contact your own health care provider for professional assistance.)