Tag Archive | building self-esteem

HELP CHILDREN FEEL VALUABLE: THREE LESSONS IN STONES

“Thank you for helping me feel like a shiny stone instead of a plain old worthless rock,” said a third-grade boy in Tucson, Arizona.

An effect and reaction like that is what I hope for when I offer a polished stone to children in classrooms – adults in audiences too – after we discuss the message of The Twelve Gifts of Birth. If you’re familiar with the book, you know that the story, illustrations, and photographs help children of all ages recognize their inner gifts and feel valuable.

To anchor the message and help make the intangible gifts of inner strength, beauty, courage, compassion, hope, joy, talent, imagination, reverence, wisdom, love and faith feel more touchable and real, I use a bowl of stones in a show and tell way. You can do this too in a one-on-one way or with any size group.

When speaking with groups, a clear fish bowl is an ideal container. Fill it at least halfway with medium-sized polished stones of all varieties. On top of all the shiny and colorful stones, place a regular, rough rock, the kind you might pick up from a street, sidewalk, or hiking trail. For a one-on-one talk, a handful of polished stones and one rough rock is sufficient.

The bowl of stones does a good job of grabbing attention and stirring curiosity in groups.  I present the bowl after the reading, discussion, and the question, “Who feels valuable in this moment?” All (or nearly all) hands shoot up.

That opens the door for THE THREE LESSONS IN POLISHED STONES.

The plain rough rock is used to acknowledge that we all sometimes feel like that: plain, ordinary, maybe even worthless. The truth is that we are all like the polished stones. Like them we’ve been tumbled. For them it was in a machine. For us it is in life.  The keepsake polished stone is meant to remind us that no matter what we look like on the surface or what we feel like, we have strength, beauty, and other valuable qualities within us always.

The second lesson the stones offer is the beauty of all their various colors, shapes, and sizes. We too come in various colors, shapes, and sizes. No matter. Like the stones, in that way too, we are all valuable.

The third lesson comes from taking a very close look at one or any number of the stones. Upon close examination, we see little cracks, nicks, scratches. While they are indeed beautiful, strong, and valuable, they are not perfect. Neither are we.

And those are three lessons for all of us to remember for ourselves and to share with the children in our lives.

Parents, teachers, counselors, all readers who may use this activity in any way, I’d love to hear from you.

I’m guessing that a collection of colorful stones can carry other meaningful messages. What do you think of the three I described? What other life lessons do you see?

Toward dignity for all,
Charlene

 

 

 

 

ABOUT BEAUTY, FROM A RECOVERING PERFECTIONIST

Tree in a meadow

“If you look closely at a tree you’ll notice its knots and dead branches, just like our bodies. What we learn is that beauty and imperfection go together wonderfully.”
~ Matthew Fox

 


I have often used polished stones as a way to demonstrate this message about beauty and imperfection.

When I give polished stones away at school presentations and workshops, I invite everyone to look closely and notice all the little nicks and scratches on the stones. Yes, they are strong and beautiful – the agates, the ambers, the amethysts, the apache tears, and the aquamarines, to name just a few. And, they are not perfect. Like us.

Another take-away from the stones is this: Colorful polished stones in circle
the stones come in all different colors,
shapes, and sizes. Like us.
And they are all beautiful. Like us.

Today and every day, let’s focus on the good and the beautiful in ourselves, others, and the world.

From a recovering perfectionist…

With love and compassion,
Charlene

WELCOME TO THE WORLD PROJECT IS LAUNCHED

Welcome to the World coverThe Twelve Gifts of Birth Foundation has launched a “conscious parenting” project that involves giving Welcome to the World keepsake folders to hospitals and birthing centers to pass on to moms of new babies.

The Welcome to the World keepsake is designed to encourage parents to nurture the inner strength, compassion, hope, joy and other natural gifts and talents in their children.

The folder includes a congratulatory letter, a Twelve Gifts Birth Certificate, and a Ways to Nurture the Gifts in Your Child mini poster with 60 simple yet powerful ways to cultivate self worth and positive character traits in children.

Both the birth certificate and mini poster Ways to Nurture posterare ideal for framing and featuring in scrapbooks.

Signed copies of The Twelve Gifts of Birth book are also given to the babies born on the launch date at each participating hospital. The project further includes a method through which participating hospitals can receive on-going donations from The Twelve Gifts of Birth Foundation.

The first institution to receive the Welcome to the World keepsakes is Winnie Palmer Hospital for Women & Babies in Orlando, Florida.

For more information about Welcome to the World and how to obtain the keepsakes, please visit www.thetwelvegiftsofbirthfoundation.com

Suggested ways to nurture The Twelve Gifts in children can be found at www.thetwelvegiftsofbirth.com

Launched with much love for all the little ones!

LIMITING BELIEFS: NOT REALLY FUNNY


Release Limiting BeliefsI find it fun and somewhat funny to read what was (obviously now) limiting thinking in the past.

After chuckling about them, limiting beliefs from the past can help us realize that they are not funny when we are being limited by them. Here are a few examples:

 

“Louis Pasteur’s theory of germs is ridiculous fiction.” ~ Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872


“This ‘telephone’ has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us.” ~ a Western Union internal memo, 1876


“I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.” ~ Thomas Watson, Chairman of IBM, 1943


“There is no reason why anyone would want a home computer.” ~ Ken Olson, President, Chairman, and Founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977


“It will be years — not in my time — before a woman will become Prime Minister.” ~ Margaret Thatcher, 1974


As we all know, germs are real, telephones and computers are everywhere, and Margaret Thatcher was able to release her limiting thinking and become Prime Minister.  


Let’s uncover and release our own limiting beliefs, such as “I’m not enough,” and see what we become.

 

WORTHINESS AND THE WIZARD OF OZ

YOU ARE WORTHYI give a lot of thought and writing time to “worthiness.”

 

So many of us feel unworthy at times.

 

While it’s painful to feel that we are unworthy, it’s downright dangerous to believe that we are unworthy.  

 

On the other hand, it’s empowering–and healing–to recognize ourselves and one another as worthy. Worthiness builds respect and opens us to reverence. Worthiness leads us to good things, to great things.

 

I just saw some valuable messages about worthiness in the film, Oz.

 

In case you don’t already know, this 2013 Disney movie, the back story of The Wizard of Oz, shows how the Wizard got to the Land of Oz long before Dorothy arrives.

 

As the story begins, we meet Oscar Diggs, a small time magician in a traveling circus in Kansas. While Oscar loves a lot of things about his work, appreciates wonderment, and has big dreams, mostly he judges himself as unworthy.

 

Steeped in the art of illusion, Oscar perceives himself to be less than honorable. He comes across that way too, as cunning, crafty, and shrewd. As viewers, we question his integrity, just as he does of himself.

 

Like Dorothy, Oscar is carried to Oz by a tornado. There, he appears to be the foretold Wizard who will defeat the Wicked Witch and restore peace and harmony in the Land of Oz.  

 

Accepting the call to act as Wizard brings Oscar through many conflicts and trials with the three witches and within himself. Often, he doubts his ability to do any good at all.  In fact, he begins to see himself as even less worthy, a really big fake, because he is pretending to be a Wizard with truly special powers.

 

It takes the Good Witch, Glinda, to reflect to him, again and again, what she sees in him: a man doing his best, a man with a caring heart, a man with limitations and flaws, yes, but a man with goodness at the core, a man who is worthy.

 

At last, at the end of the movie, Oscar sees himself as worthy. He commits to trying his best to restore peace and harmony to the Land of Oz. He becomes the Wizard.

 

May we all see worthiness in ourselves and one another, do our best to bring peace and harmony to our world, and become what we are called to be.

FAITH IS LIKE A SAFETY NET

Purple stained cloth and glass

I had just written my “Today’s Touchstone” message for tomorrow about faith being like a safety net.

 

I made a Berry Smoothie and then slipped on a drop of water on the kitchen floor.

 

The  amazing thing is: I felt cradled on the way down to the tile.  Time slowed.  I somehow landed gently.  So did the glass.  It fell on the tile but did not break!


I wish I had thought to get a photo of the mess before my husband kindly cleaned it up. The deep purple drink splattered everywhere. Here’s a photo of that glass next to a formerly-white washcloth after repeated rinsing.

One sip of the drink remained in the glass. It was delicious.

 

What was more delicious was experiencing a sense of safety and being cared for, even during and after the fall, especially in light of what I had just written to share with others:

 

“Parachutes weren’t proven trustworthy
by having people carry them around on their backs.
The device showed its reliability once someone jumped.”
– Mary Manin Morrissey

 

Are you facing anything now that calls for a leap of faith?
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