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HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY

Happy Mother’s Day to all mothers. Praise and prayers for all who have birthed, raised, and guided children into and through adulthood, for all who are just beginning this vital vocation, for all in every stage of nurturing others toward vibrant living and loving.

 

 

 

“Being a mother is an attitude, not a biological relation.”
~ Robert A. Heinlein

 

 

 

As I gratefully remember my own mother this Mother’s Day, I expand this tribute to all our mothers and on to all who “mother.”

I know some childless women, and some men too, who mentor, lead, feed, teach, train, heal, counsel…perform any and every kind of service in such a heart-centered and soulful way that it can be characterized as mothering. Most likely you do too. Mother Teresa is a paramount example.

Some may object to this far-reaching tribute, maintaining that this day is designated to honor mothers in a literal way. But I think, by expanding our recognition, we celebrate motherhood in a way that reveres mothers and elevates “mothering” itself. Imagine, if beyond both the surface and the sincerest expressions of venerating mothers, our culture encouraged girls and boys, men and women, children and adults – all of us – to respect, support, cultivate, and practice the ideals and characteristics of mothering. Imagine if we held in higher regard: unconditional love, forgiveness, listening, kindness, compassion, being of service, healing touch, tears, tenderness, and honest expressions of feelings. I think we would become more real, healthy, happy, peaceful and successful.

On this Mother’s Day, may we honor Mother Nature too and “Be kind to everything that lives,” as a matriarchal Native American proverb prescribes.

With love and reverence for all,

Charlene

(from TODAY’S TOUCHSTONE)


 

Small DeerMouse on Beach

A PERSPECTIVE ON HOPE

 

 

 


“This place where you are right now, God circled on a map for you.”
                                ~ Hafiz the Poet

 
I love this quote.  One reason is that I love maps. Maps of all kinds, including funny treasure maps.

But mostly it is because this quote reminds me to trust that there are blessings available in every circumstance, every challenge, every opportunity, every loss, every gain, every moment.

Whenever we think we are off course – perhaps lost  – and feeling fearful, the loving message of this quote can help us shift into a hope-filled perspective.

To illustrate how, I’d like to welcome a guest blogger today. Jesse Gros is a fellow classmate and alum from the University of Santa Monica where we both studied spiritual psychology.

Here is Jesse’s example:

WHY I (ALMOST) NEVER GET STRESSED OUT…

When I was a college senior, I came back from my study abroad trip with Hep A. I picked it up in Morocco eating street food. Or maybe it was from sharing lunch with the homeless guys under the bridge by my house in Sevilla. Who knows for sure.

My doctor back in the US told me it would take me a couple years to fully recover. He also said that if I allowed myself to get stressed, it could trigger a relapse that could severely damage my liver.

So, at 21 years old, I made not-getting-stressed my number one priority. I was scared that even one pre-midterm, mini freak out could send me back to the hospital. During the following year, I learned to change my thoughts, breathe, meditate, and drink lots of “calming” tea. I learned to treat stress, not as something to learn to tolerate or adapt to, but to avoid at all costs…

What a gift it was to be told, “Stress will kill you.” Which we know is true on a long enough timeline…

Thank you for sharing this experience, Jesse.

We can readily see how a serious threat to his life at a young age affected the rest of Jesse’s life in a positive way.

Jesse’s story reminds me to take stress more seriously in my own life. While stress may not be as extreme a danger for most of us as it was for Jesse, it is a threat to all of us. Stress does kill! It weakens our immune system, for one thing.

Jesse’s example deepens my commitment to stay in balance, to nurture well-being, to meditate daily, to be at peace, to forgive, to love, and to laugh…often.

Consider holding this quote as a touchstone, especially when faced with a situation that seems frightening.

Imagine a map of your life journey. Step by step you are circled, watched. Not with criticism. Not with judgment. But with unconditional love and guidance.

May we believe in every moment there are opportunities for healings, learnings, awakenings, and advances that will benefit us for the rest of our lives and will help others too.

 

Jesse Gros is a life coach, adventurer, philanthropist and owner of Insight Adventures. He is also the author of Your Wild and Precious Life: Adventures in Conscious Creation

 

 

 

THE SOUL OF AMERICA

 

 

“In this world, which is getting more and more closely interconnected, we have to learn to tolerate each other, we have to learn to put up with the fact that some people say things that we don’t like. We can only live together in that way. But if we are to live together, and not die together, we must learn a kind of charity and a kind of tolerance, which is absolutely vital to the continuation of human life on this planet… Love is wise; hatred is foolish.”
                                                      ~  Bertrand Russell

 

Like millions of other people in America and around the world, I am deeply concerned not only about the direction, the health, and the safety of our country, I am concerned about its soul. Our soul.

How did meanness and bullying become acceptable? How did bravado come to be admired? How and why did fear, hate and disrespect erupt and spread like a disease among us?

I’ve heard the theories – perhaps you have too – that hidden dis-ease rising to the surface is a good thing.

Actually, it CAN be a good thing, but it IS NOT automatically a good thing. Continue reading

APPLYING THE HEALING POWER OF LOVE TO BREAST CANCER

Love And Tenderness Of Cats

 

“Love one another and help others to rise to the higher levels, simply by pouring out love. Love is infectious and the greatest healing energy.”
~
Sai Baba

 

 

Love and healing are primary themes in my life now. They have been for many months, actually years. Whenever I see messages of fear and hate in the news – when I see reports of violence – what comes to the forefront for me are thoughts and quotes like “Love heals” from The Buddha.  

I’m focused on the healing power of love in a very personal way now too. And I wish to share the reason.

A few weeks ago I was diagnosed with cancer in both breasts. Fortunately the tumors are small and treatable.

Along with embracing traditional medicine, I am using many complementary approaches to balance, heal, renew, and strengthen my whole body. In part, that means loving and caring for every little cell, every organ, and every body system as well as looking deeper for what else is calling for healing in me now.

Along with good nutrition (the photo here is of me about to drink a double shot of wheat grass), positive visualization, prayer, meditation, etc., wheatgrass shot
I am bringing the powers of courage, faith, hope, joy
– all of life’s gifts, God’s gifts – to this new adventure.

For it is that too. An adventure. A challenge, yes. But also an adventure. An opportunity to explore and to heal deeply on all levels – physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. To learn and grow too.

While I won’t be focusing on this personal healing adventure in many blogs, I will share a bit from time to time here and in Today’s Touchstone reflections.  I’ll offer insights and discoveries that I think you may wish to consider…things that may apply to anyone and everyone’s life journey.

I hope you will enjoy such sharings and benefit from them in some way. I would appreciate hearing if you do or do not. I always welcome your feedback.

In the meantime, I appreciate your caring and pouring out love to yourselves, to me, to one another, to all your beloveds  and to your-not-so-beloveds too.  May we all aim to heal all our wounds.

Thank you.

Kindly,
Charlene

SOUL TO SOUL

                     “Blessed is the influence of one true, loving human soul on another.” ~ George Eliot

​Using our gifts, let’s be that: true, loving human souls, blessed influences in the lives of others.

How? First, we aim to be authentic, courageously ourselves, centered in our loving essence. That itself will be a blessing to many.

SOUL TO SOULNext, have a “soul to soul” with at least one person today and every day. What’s a “soul to soul”? It’s like a “heart to heart.” Except, instead of having an actual heartfelt conversation with someone, you communicate “soul to soul.”

Visualize, with a caring feeling, that you are connecting and communicating with a particular person. Set ego aside and allow a wise and loving exchange to happen, “soul to soul.” Even if you don’t “hear” anything back from the other soul, which is often the case, just send a message of respect, acceptance, and encouragement. Or, you can simply say, with reverence,  Namaste or The Light in me honors the Light in you.

You can choose someone you easily talk with or someone who avoids close sharing and intimacy. You can even do this with an estranged family member or friend. Healing miracles can come from this practice.

May wisdom guide the way for each of us to become true loving souls and blessed influences in the world.

Toward peace,
Charlene

ROCK MY SOUL

“So high I can’t get over itCarried by Love
So low I can’t get under it

So wide I can’t get round it
Oh, rock my soul.”

Do you know this Peter, Paul, and Mary song?

When I sang it back in the ’60s with fellow St. Bonaventure students at a popular Olean, NY coffeehouse/bar, I didn’t understand its meaning. What was the it that was too high, too wide, and too deep to get around? Actually, I didn’t give it that much thought. I just liked the tune and the way we sang it in rounds, led by a student folk group, The Wooden Nickel. 

I don’t yet know for sure, but it seems to me now that the it can be any challenge or painful experience that we don’t want to go through. We’d rather get around it. But we can’t. The only way is to go through it and experience the it. 

This song has come into my consciousness several times in recent years when I’ve faced something big. I think it was wisdom’s way of showing me that I needed comfort and that I could be carried through, rocked and cradled in the arms of Love. We all can. 

May we welcome the lifting of Love whenever we face…whatever we face.  

Wishing you love and all that you need.

Always,
Charlene 
                   

ONE MINUTE OF WORLD PEACE – JOIN IN – OCTOBER 11

Toward World PeaceOne Minute of World Peace is back for a third year.

What is it? Orchestrated by Tara Leduc from Delta, British Columbia,  Canada, it is one minute, synchronized across all the world’s time zones, where people do something that means peace to them.

It’s simple and easy to do yet powerful too.

Please join in. Here’s how:

Mark your calendar for Saturday, October 11. Enter it into your phone too.

According to Tara:

Next, scratch your head, and decide how YOU can be peace for 1 minute.
Do anything that means peace to you:
* Do a random act of kindness
* Tell your family how much you love them
* Meditate
* Sing a song
* Help someone across the street
* Volunteer your time
* Do yoga
* Hug (or cuddle or…you know) your lover
* Spend a minute Imagining a World with Peace.

Invite others, too. “I mean, everyone,” says Tara. “Let’s make this go huge! I mean, who wouldn’t want to feel peace? Who wouldn’t you want to share peace with? Can you imagine how great it’ll feel when 100,000+ people around the world feel peace all at once? It gives me shivers. It blows my heart wide open.”

Me too, Tara. So, I’m in.

This reminds me of Hands Across America, something that my family and I did on May 25, 1986. On that day an estimated 6.5 million people joined in and literally held hands across America.

By the way, this One Minute of World Peace is different than One Minute For Peace, which is my own initiative of taking one minute for peace each day at 1:11.

Did Hands Across America matter? Does it change anything? Do these peace actions matter? What do you think? I think they do. I know that when I do things like this, I am moved a little bit closer to glimpsing that we are, indeed, all connected. I am moved toward greater peace, love, joy, and hope in my daily life. And I have faith that we are all touched and affected, for the good.

 

SEE WITH AWE

SEE WITH WONDERWhat a beautiful idea. Imagine if we could see at least one thing this way every day. What joy that would bring. Peace too.

How do we do this?  We don’t see as we did when we were children. With wonderment. Over time our senses have dulled. We’ve seen so much. Perhaps too much. There may be things we wish we have never seen. Continue reading

HOPE FOR ALL AGES AND STAGES OF LIFE

 A week ago, Suffield High School Principal Donna Hayward in Suffield, Connecticut delivered a commencement address that was inspired by The Twelve Gifts of Birth.  I’m sharing it here because I believe Ms. Hayward’s message of hope and courage is for all of us. Thank you, Donna, for permission to post your speech along with your photo. I hope to meet you someday, new friend!  And thank you, dear reader. As always, I would love to hear your comments.  

Donna HaywardClass of 2014, you are just minutes from receiving your high school diploma. Your parents are wondering how you got here so fast, as it seems such a short time ago that you were born. Just a few years ago, you took your first steps, spoke your first words, got on the school bus kindergarten bound, learned to ride a bike. This is a natural time for your parents to reflect on the last 18 or so years and for us, your teachers, to reflect on whatever role we have played in your upbringing. As it turns out, teaching and parenting are closely related.

When my daughter was born, we received the usual tidal wave of gifts – blankets, cute little outfits, and baby gear of all kinds. One gift, in particular, though stood out as it arrived without a note or tag from the sender to indicate who had given it. One day, it simply arrived in my mailbox – its message clear – but to this day I don’t know who sent it. It was a book entitled, The Twelve Gifts of Birth, by Charlene Costanzo and it details the gifts or qualities bestowed upon each of you upon your birth as a human. “Royal dignity was yours from the day you were born,” the book begins – and on that day and on a day such as this all parents and teachers hope their children know these gifts. My role today is to remind you that you do all have them and to implore you to use them consciously and with purpose from this day forward.

The first gift is Hope and each of you were born with it. Continue reading

CATS: AND THE LESSONS THEY TEACH US

We have two cats. Both adopted us in 2001.

 

My husband and I were traveling in a motor home from Arizona to Florida.

 

MinkaAt a KOA in Texas, as we pulled onto our site, a homeless Tortie kitten raced across the campground, sat, and meowed outside our door. We let her in and named her Minka.

 

Three days later, a handsome grey shorthair did the same thing at a campground in Orlando. We named him Bailey.

 

Over the years, Minka and Bailey have given us many gifts and life lessons. They’ve shown us how to play, be silly, stretch, be flexible and graceful, cuddle, snuggle, nap, be present, savor scents and all our senses, stay nicely groomed, and more.

 

Last week, Bailey was diagnosed with widespread carcinomatosis. Our vet saidBailey that our sweet boy cat has perhaps two months to live. Probably less. Among the hard things: we are going to have to decide when to say when.

 

We’ve never had to put a pet down. We aim to preserve life. In fact, in our home we’ve had a catch-and-release program (for spiders, mice, and other unwelcomed house guests) in place since the 1980s.

 

But we must consider Bailey’s comfort and quality of life.

 

Among the good things: facing death hurts, and yet it can lead us toward greater love and compassion.  Continue reading